More Doesn’t Convert.
It overwhelms, distances… and quietly costs you the relationship.
I caught myself the other day… doing “more.”
More explaining. More clarifying. More adding context—just in case.
It wasn’t a sales call. It was a simple conversation.
And yet, I could feel it.
That subtle shift.
The moment where I moved from connection… to the backstory.
The instinct to do more
Most experts-turned-business-owners don’t struggle because they lack effort.
They struggle because they apply effort in the wrong direction.
So what do we do?
We:
- Post more
- Follow up more
- Explain more
- Add more value
- Try harder to “prove” ourselves
Because somewhere along the way, we learned:
👉 If it’s not working… do more.
Same thing I do with physical therapy. The instructions state: “two or three times a day.” My internalization: three times, without fail, every day.
I push myself as if the sheer force of will is the answer.
“More” often feels like pressure—especially to the person viewing you.
And if you already don’t want to be perceived as pushy or salesy?
It backfires.
What your prospect is actually experiencing
While you’re thinking: “I just want to be helpful…”
They may be thinking:
- “This is a lot.”
- “I’m not sure what to focus on.”
- “I feel like I’m being led somewhere…”
The hidden layer: personality styles
In my AlikeAbility™ System:
- A #8 may appreciate depth and explanation
- A #2 or #4 may feel overwhelmed by that same depth
- A #6 may need time, reassurance, and space to process
So when you “do more,” you may actually be moving away from how your prospects make decisions.
Suggested shift: Less Output, More Awareness
What works instead?
Not less effort. Different effort.
Instead of doing more… try:
- Listening more
- Asking more
- Observing more
- Verifying more
Because connection isn’t built through volume.
It’s built through attunement.
C2C Relationship Building Framework
Here’s the shift in action:
1. Slow the conversation down You don’t need to get to the outcome quickly.
2. Stay with their world longer than feels comfortable Most people leave too soon. Most prospects like to talk about their situations.
3. Reflect before you respond Let them hear themselves through you. Rephrase what you heard and confirm you got it right.
4. Verify, don’t assume Clarity builds trust.
C2C Tweaks (small shifts, big difference)
Instead of: “I can help you with that.”
Try: 👉 “Would it be helpful to explore that together?”
Instead of: “Let me explain how this works.”
Try: 👉 “Would you like a quick overview, or should we explore this matter a bit longer?”
Instead of: “That’s a common problem.”
Try: 👉 “It sounds like this has been frustrating—am I hearing that right?”
C2C Swipes
Use these to reduce pressure while increasing connection:
- “Tell me more about what’s been happening.”
- “What feels most important to solve right now?”
- “What have you already tried?”
- “What would a good outcome look like for you?”
- “Let me reflect back what I’m hearing…”
The paradox
The more you try to move the conversation forward…
The more it stalls.
The more you stay present…
The more it naturally progresses.
Because people don’t move forward when they feel managed.
They move forward when they feel understood.
If this resonates…Let’s talk.
Not to do more, but to help you do what actually converts.
The LinkedIn Profile Lab is an opportunity to optimize your profile, attract the right-fit prospects, and gain confidence in your ability to generate leads and turn them into clients.
I invite you to join this hands-on workshop next week. https://nancyzare.com/profile-lab
To your business success!
Nancy Zare, Ph.D.
Helping Experts Become Confident Business Owners
